I recently re-read the book “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. The first time I read it was about 6 years ago and I really liked it. However, I was encouraged to read it again and I was surprised at how much more I got out of it this time around. I wanted to share with you my take on the book and the lessons I learned the second time around.
The first agreement in the book is “Be Impeccable with Your Word”. I loved this chapter because to me being impeccable with your word is an integrity thing. I start to lose trust with people that say one thing and do another, well not the first few times because everyone has a right to change their mind, but when it is something that consistently happens the trust starts to fade.
Being impeccable with our word encourages us to get real and stop lying to ourselves and to others. So often people wear a mask and hide behind that mask because of fear. Often people play the role they think others want them to play instead of being true to themselves and impeccable with their word.
The words we choose to use will manifest within our life. For example, if we continue to say we are having a bad day it is highly likely ”the bad day” will continue and get worse because that is what you are putting out into the world. The energy of our words matter. Therefore, being impeccable with our word can make a huge difference in our life.
The second agreement is “Don’t Take Anything Personally”. Wow, this is a good one! The author describes this really well. I had never thought about it this way . . . when you take things personally it puts you in the space of personal importance and we assume everything is about us. When in fact, it is about what the other person is going through and has nothing to do with us personally. It was also a reminder that when we start to defend and take things personally we get into a place of making ourselves right and others wrong.
By not taking things personally you can open your heart and live more heart centered in life.
The third agreement is, “Don’t Make Assumptions”. This is so true and so hard to do. When we make assumptions we convince ourselves they are the truth when in most cases they are not. By making assumptions we create a lot of unnecessary drama in our lives. I also felt this chapter reinforced the importance of asking questions, getting clarification and asking for what you want. Do not assume someone else knows what you want.
The fourth agreement is, “Always Do Your Best”. This agreement is one I often find myself saying. In challenging situations I often ask myself if I am doing my best. I try to remember this when I am frustrated with someone and use this as a reminder that they are doing the best they can at this given moment.
One thing I found interesting in this chapter is that “our best” can change. Doing our best when we are feeling vibrant and healthy looks very different from doing our best when we are feeling run down and tired. The point being we are still doing our best in both situations and accepting that “doing our best” will change from situation to situation.
I encourage you to read the book, “The Four Agreements” because it is a quick read and you will surely get something out of it whether it is the first time your read it or the second.